It’s not for everyone, this documentary family photography thing.

It takes a very specific kind of person to see the value in documentary photos and family films – and choose that gift for their own family.

I’ve noticed, over the years, that those that do, all share these three defining characteristics.

They regularly surrender to the grace of appreciating their life as it is. It’s not that they never struggle with the need for perfection. They do. I do. But these people are able to push past that and see the beauty that’s before them. The bed head, crowning their children each morning. The sink, full of dishes. The floor, covered in Lego chaos or princess dresses. The love, filling their home right now. Truly, the women who hire me don’t need my help in seeing the beauty in their days, at all. Their eyes are wide open. They just need my help to capture it and the way it feels, in photos and film.

They spend less time worrying about what their neighbor thinks about them, and more time enjoying what they have. Which means, they have a slight rebellious streak. (Okay, maybe it’s more than ‘slight’.) It also means they’re generally content in the life they’re living. Sure, they may have plans to repaint the kitchen or dreams of traveling to Paris one day – but at this moment, there’s nowhere they’d rather be, no life they’d rather live. And they’re grateful for that gift.

They realize this phase of life is exactly that, a phase. A time they’ll never get back. And they already know they’re going to want these memories. They’ll want to see their children, their life, their home, just as it is. No pretenses. No faking. They know what they have right now is beautiful, because it’s full of love.